The Latest Craze

So what will you find in any cool, self-respecting 8-year olds back pack in KL? A packet of fags? Crystal meth? No! Only ownership of a puffer can keep you in with the incrowd nowadays. Have to admit they are quite cute - and I've got quite a collection of confiscated puffers of varying sizes and colours. Not as cool as a space hopper though! Ah -those were the days.......

Year of the Rat

Throughout the Chinese New Year celebrations horoscopes for the upcoming year of the Rat can be found in every publication. While retaining my cynicism I do enjoy reading about my destiny. Interestingly though there have been several common themes through all the horoscopes I have read.

Firstly, it seems that I will be plagued by gastro-intestinal problems. Hmmm. While this could be a given considering that we are living in Asia it seems strange that every one I've read says this same thing. So I wondered, if this first prediction is true what else has appeared in all of the readings? Only two suggestions are repeated thoughout:

1) 2008 would be a good year to change career (travel writing here I come?)
2) Wedding bells will be heard (ha ha - will assume this means for my recently engaged friends and not for me).

Whatever happens I have a good feeling about 2008. Think it is going to be a good one!

Ali the Hutt R.I.P?????

It was back to Gleneagles on Thursday for a follow up appointment with the doctor. Feeling a bit more positive now that I finally felt that I had been correctly diagnosed and had the right medication I asked the doctor how long my boring food regime would have to last. Without sugar coating it in the slightest he answered "forever"!!!

Waterworks would be an understatement much to the astonishment of Dr Ryan who asked why I was crying.

"I just love food," was my sniffly reply.

I don't mind cutting out a limited selection but not all the good stuff. And to be honest the words Tee-total and Ali don't really go together. So we have come to a compromise. When I feel better I'll start reintroducing things one at a time to see what hurts and what doesn't. Fingers crossed a nice cold glass of wine is ok!

Don't worry this blog isn't going to become a forum for me to whinge about my ailments, and I'm glad to say that I am actually starting to feel a little more like myself. I haven't had any cramps today at all and haven't had to place my head within 10cm of a toilet seat for a week! Hoorah!

Gong Xi Fa Chai

A slightly belated happy Chinese New Year and a happy birthday to you all. It is the seventh night of the celebrations which means it is the day we all turn a year older (not again!). But for me Chinese New Year has meant FIREWORKS. I have always loved the view from my apartment and it has been further improved each evening for the last 10 days with beautiful displays. I've just been sitting on the balcony watching bursts of colour punctuate the night sky, while whizzes and bangs compete with the mosque below. They just seem to get better and better. I'm not sure how the lantern festival on the 15th day will compete with what I've already seen. Happy Year of the Rat!

Purgatory

After Christmas I started a bit of a health kick under the false assumption that it would help me feel better. When I explained to the doc that I had switched alcohol for freshjuice and had been eating salads and fruit he actually told me that I had made my stomach worse and that I would have been better off eating a MacDonalds for dinner every night!! Straight from the horses mouth - I kid you not.

So although I am starting to feel better I am on strict instructions from the doc about my eating habits. I am not allowed:

• citrus fruits
• tomatoes
• alchohol
• coffee !!!
• cheese
• chocolate

Basically, anything I really love is out. I'm really missing the coffee (as are my students on my behalf) and I can't wait to tuck into the English Dairy Milk in my fridge. Keep your fingers crossed that my stomach will soon be cleansed and I can make my way to food heaven.

Who Needs Horror Movies?

Last week I experienced the best that medical insurance can buy in KL. After over 2 months of feeling like I had a perpetual hangover I was finally referred to a gastroenterologist at Gleneagles. Don't worry, some delightful tests have shown that there is nothing really nasty going on, but I am suffering the after effects of some hardcore bacteria which has ravaged my stomach. Ah, the joys of living in Asia - I may love the street stalls but clearly they don't love me!

Getting discharged was harder than breaking out of Alcatraz (they wouldn't remove my canula or give me my medication until the insurance company had paid up!) but when I did I was presented with a goody bag. In addition to all the little pills to make me feel better I found ultrasound pictures of all my organs and ......a dvd. Yes they kindly gave me a dvd of my endoscopy and colonoscopy! It has been sitting on my table for a week now and today curiosity got the better of me........ Don't worry I won't go in to details, but I will admit I really didn't need to see that. Whoever thought that providing patients with footage of their insides should really have their head seen to!

Arachnophopia

As if the prospect of having to bump start my car isn't enough to deter most people from coming on road trips with me I think I will have less takers after the most recent incident.

Pulling into my parking space I reached down to put the handbrake and noticed a couple of tiny spiders. Commenting on the fact that somehow spiders had somehow got in I looked over at my travelling companion only to realise that he was covered loads of the little buggers. Yep, somehow a wily spider laid some eggs in my car and they had chosen that moment to hatch. Delightful!

The car now smells of Raid and I am trying to come to terms with the massacre.